It's always hard to write my first weekly column of the season, as I've only seen teams play in preseason, not to mention I just finished my season predictions hours ago. As the season progresses though, this column will probably get longer and a little more in depth. This week, I'm just going to stick to the basics. Oh, and I am so not doing final score predictions this year. And as usual, I could give a shit about the over/under so don't ask. If you have any questions, email me at hectorvex@hectorvex.com

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Oakland +7.5 at New England

I'd like to bet on Oakland to get the upset, but only if they were playing at home. And only if I could shit money so I could waste it. New England should come out of the gate on all cylinders, while the Raiders are still getting used to each other. I'm not betting on this game (as I prefer parlays and the next game is Sunday and I don't have that much patience,) but if I was I'd take the Pats with the points. The .5 there is in the bookie favor, but I think they'll win by at least 10.

Denver -5.0 at Miami

The only reason I can see why this is a five point spread and not a 15 point spread is the bookies don't want Miami to beat it. Denver looks shaky this year, but not that shaky. The Fins are not going to have their shit together enough to start out the season by beating the Broncos. Just in case, I'm taking the Broncos to win on the Moneyline, which means straight up - not taking the points. It's a lesser bet, but a smarter one.

Cincinnati -3.5 at Cleveland

The Browns aren't looking great this year, but I smell season opening upset. These two teams play a great cross-state rival game and it's always high scoring. This time though, I expect the Browns to score a little bit more. I'm taking my Dawgs to win straight up. If you're a chicken shit and you think it'll be close - take them on the points.

Houston +5.5 at Buffalo

Ooh, I bet you'd love to take Houston in the upset? They have a habit of opening day upsets. But I don't think that's going to happen in Buffalo. This is going to be a walking win for the Bills, so much so that I'm taking them to win with the points.

Tennessee +7.0 at Pittsburgh

Now this is a good line. Seven even is a nice thing to see. I think it's a bit low though. The Titans are going to have a hard time with the Steelers defense, at least, I hope they do. Roethlesberger has looked pretty shaky this preseason, so there's that to consider. I think this game is going to end up being scary close. I'm taking the Titans to cover the spread, not to win, just cover.

Chicago +6.0 at Washington

I'm finding it hard to believe this game isn't an even line. Come game day it might be so get your bets in now. I can't figure out which team has a worse situation at QB, so I'm not going to bet on this at all. But, since I still have to predict something, I'm thinking this is where Chicago's losing season begins. I'd take the 'Skins with the points.

New Orleans +7.0 at Carolina

Everyone has counted the Saints out, and counted the Panthers in. I've got it figured the other way around though. I think the Saints are going to have that explosive year they've been looking for. There is so much emotion on that team right now, I don't see how they can't translate that into on-the-field play. I'm taking them to win straight up and upset the Panthers.

Tampa Bay +6.0 at Minnesota

I'm not giving the Bucs the benefit of the doubt. They seriously suck ass. They have a couple of good players, but they haven't had a team for years. The Vikings, even without Moss, should still be able to roll the Bucs like little bitches. I'm taking the Vikings with the points.

Seattle +3.0 at Jacksonville

Jacksonville has played some close games in their history, and Seattle, well, they haven't as much. So I'm not taking Seattle on the points in this game as I think Holmgren will start the year off with a migraine. I'm taking the Jags to win with the points.

N.Y. Jets +3.0 at Kansas City

The only reason the Chiefs are favored is because of the homefield advantage thing. I guarantee. This can be figured because the payout odds for the Jets winning aren't as great as they should be. I'm taking the Jets to win straight up.

Arizona +2.5 at N.Y. Giants

Oh, here's a nice spread. Less than a fucking field goal. Are the bookies on drugs? Actually, these teams do suck that bad, so I can see a 7-6 game happening here. I'm going to go out on a limb and take the Cardinals to win straight up.

St. Louis -6.0 at San Francisco

I will not bet on the Niners all year. I am telling you this now. They will not beat the spread and they will not win enough games for me to even think about taking them as an upset pick. Who the hell would they upset? Arizona? No, this pile of suck will lose. Take St. Louis with the points.

Green Bay +3.0 at Detroit

The Lions will do good this year, and an opening day beating of Green Bay would kick off a great season. But that's not going to happen. Favre owns the Lions. I'm taking Green Bay to win.

Dallas +4.5 at San Diego

I'd like to say that Dallas can pull off the upset here, but that's not probable. The Chargers still look like they are on fire from last year (a 'la old school NBA Jam) and will win this game by at least a touchdown. Take the Chargers with the points.

Indianapolis -3.0 at Baltimore

By the way, these shitty ass lines will change as the season goes on. I'm tired of the three point spreads. Anyways, the Colts will face a defensive challenge against the Ravens, but c'mon - it's Peyton. Manning. On the other side of the coin though, it's Ray. Lewis. This is a Sunday night game, and it's outdoors. That aside, it's Peyton Manning. Have you seen this dude play? I'm taking the Colts to win with the points.

Philadelphia -1.5 at Atlanta

Yeah, take the Falcons to beat the spread. Just kidding. Here's your Monday night game, where both teams tend to shine. This game is almost too good to pick a winner. Well, ok, I'm picking the Eagles to win. Might as well take them with the points as well.

Full 2005 Season Predictions can be found here.