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My Sports Prayer

If there is a just and loving God, then I pray to him, now.

Please God, if there truly be any mercy within you, then burn to a cinder any person of any age, race or sex who plays, coaches, sponsors, makes equipment for, or enjoys watching Curling.

Just one more thing, God.

While you're at it, could you infect Al Micheals with some festering, incurable, untreatable, hideously painful disease?

Oh yeah, and thank you, thank you, thank you for Anna Kournikova.

Amen

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Comments (4)

Gee Tom, I never knew you w... (Below threshold)

Gee Tom, I never knew you were so spiritual. I'm almost moved to tears (because I was not included on the cursing part of your prayer that is). lol

Oh yeah, I'm way spiritual.... (Below threshold)
Tom:

Oh yeah, I'm way spiritual. You should hear me talking to God when some jerk cuts me off in heavy traffic.

Hey bruddah Al is cool. He... (Below threshold)
clyde marugame:

Hey bruddah Al is cool. He's from Hawaii. Why the voo doo hex on him. Just because he not only does football but now basketball. And his vocabulary has words beyond "Yes a spectacular move".

If anyone needs to be prayed for it's CBS pre-game panel. Where is Howard Cosell when you need him?

Anna is ok. Serena has body and game. But unfortunately she's tied up with Keyshawn. I guess this old phrase applies "Different strokes for different folks".

If "condescending jerk" in ... (Below threshold)
Tom:

If "condescending jerk" in Hawaiian means "cool", then yeah, Al's all kinds of cool.

Notice how MNF struggles with ratings year after year after year, despite attempting a slew of quick fixes? The only constant over this period of ratings and in-booth strife is Al. Why? Because only simpletons can stand the guy.

You know, guys wish they could have sex with Howard Cosell as badly as Al wishes that he could. Guys who think that one's home state determines one's personal level of "cool".

Anna is ungodly hot just as she is. Serena would have to have that hideous nub atop her shoulders removed before I'd even let my dog have at her.


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